The Jay has not been for a week, and I’m left wondering if it’s just the time of year. There is more food around for him, like the famous acorns.
I hope that is the case and that nothing ominous has happened.

I always feel this way when the Jay has been absent for a week or so. It’s more relieving when he comes back because at least I know he’s alive and was just living his life, and it lets me know he’s not become reliant on me.

I suppose it’s interesting that I use the word ‘ominous’ when writing about what could have happened.
As if something evil may have gripped him and plucked him out of the world. Yet I know that is not what death is, logically speaking.
If he has fallen like the leaves on the trees, it is simply a part of the cycle of life and death, nothing more and nothing less.

But it’s hard to reconcile love for something or someone with the idea of death. In a certain frame of mind, it makes the world look like an evil place, and the dirt beneath our feet becomes something that cages us in disgust rather than the knowledge of what that dirt encompasses.
It’s easy to write about as a concept, to logically write out the words that death & life are intermingled in ways we don’t usually emotionally feel.

Another case of emotions always being far behind the pace of the facts and knowledge. You can learn so much factually, but does it always matter emotionally? It doesn’t seem so.

I suppose there has to be a point where emotions catch up to the facts, isn’t that just healing?

Sometimes the way people talk about loved ones that have passed I get an eerie feeling that no one is really healing from it, though they feel healed, but, then they’ll say a common bird like a Robin is a sign from their loved one.

Is that healing or just a lie?

But then, is there a more philosophical way of looking at it? Are these fantasies people want to believe a subtle acknowledgement of life & death being intermingled? Just translated wrong?

Isn’t life & death a symbiotic relationship? Therefore it could be said that the Robin is simply being used as a symbol of how a loved one’s death is, in turn, feeding life. As death ultimately becomes nutrients?

I think the problem is people take the Robin thing literally (which is ironic since I’m the autistic one 😉 ).

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